In the seven years of my hidden marriage, I had conceived five children. but all die,my husband was heartbroken,but after i know the truth,my heart was bleeding!
Chapter 1
In the seven years of my hidden marriage, I had conceived five children. Each one was stillborn.
Gerrald Raymond was heartbroken over my condition and specially hired a top-tier nutritionist to adjust my diet. He reassured me, time and time again, that we would eventually have a healthy child together.
The day I found out I was pregnant again, my heart overflowed with joy. I rushed to share the good news with Gerrald, eager to see his reaction. Instead, I overheard a conversation between him and his closest friend, Lucas O'conell, just outside a private club room.
"You killed Jenny Wond's five children just to provide specimens for Lydia Maron’s medical experiments? Are you insane? Those were your own flesh and blood!"
Gerrald's voice remained indifferent, as if the topic had nothing to do with him.
"Lydia is passionate about her research. I don’t know much about medicine, so the best I can do is be her strongest supporter and give her whatever she needs."
Lucas's voice carried disbelief and anger. "But those were your own children! How could you be so cruel?"
Gerrald merely chuckled. "Does it matter? The marriage certificate between Jenny and me is fake. Any child she bore would be illegitimate, unacknowledged, unwanted. What does it matter if they lived or died? My wife can only be Lydia."
At that moment, everything I had believed in shattered. The marriage I had cherished was nothing but a fraud. The man I had loved with all my heart was nothing more than a monster in human skin. Since this was the truth, there was no longer any need for illusions.
——
Lucas's voice was heavy with emotion. "If Lydia is the only one you love, why did you ever marry Jenny? Why did you let her carry your children?"
Gerrald smirked. "Because Lydia wanted to study abroad. And I, being a normal man, had certain... needs. Jenny was still untouched when she got together with me—pure, easy to deceive into a hidden marriage. Plus, keeping her by my side ensured she wouldn’t go out and mess around, bringing back some disgusting disease."
He paused, then continued with chilling nonchalance. "As for the children... I don’t like using protection and she was so desperate to be a mother. I figured, why not let her have them for fun? Not like I ever planned on letting them live."
Lucas's face darkened. "But you let her live in blissful ignorance for seven whole years. You let her carry and lose five children. And now, you're throwing her away like she never mattered. Jenny loves you deeply. Do you really think she’ll survive this?"
Gerrald impatiently waved him off. "Enough. She was just a poor countryside girl who got lucky, living a lavish life thanks to me. I gave her more than she could have ever dreamed of."
Then, in an almost gleeful tone, he added, "Three days from now, Lydia and I will be leaving the country for our wedding. Be sure to attend and drink to our happiness."
Lucas let out a long sigh. "Gerrald, don’t blame me for not warning you. Hurting someone who truly loves you… one day, you’ll regret it."
Gerrald scoffed. "As long as I can marry Lydia in grand style, I won’t regret a damn thing—even if it kills me. Save your sentimental nonsense."
Lucas shook his head, exasperated. There was nothing more to say.
***
The joy that had filled my heart only moments ago evaporated, leaving behind a hollow emptiness. I stood frozen in place, my body cold as ice. Then, Gerrald turned and saw me. My tear-streaked face seemed to startle him. Panic flashed across his eyes as he rushed toward me.
"Jenny! When did you get here? Why are you crying like this?"
His voice held traces of concern, even heartbreak.
I quickly wiped my tears and forced a smile. "It’s nothing. My false eyelashes weren’t applied properly and one got into my eye. My makeup skills are just awful."
Gerrald let out a relieved sigh before pulling me into his arms. He stroked my hair gently and whispered, "Seeing you cry breaks my heart. Don’t wear those things anymore, okay? My wife is already the most beautiful woman in the world. Now, let’s go home."
His words were as sweet as ever, dripping with affection. But they no longer held any warmth for me.
Once, I had adored him, trusted him. When I had first graduated and joined the Raymond Family’s company, I had been bullied and humiliated by my superiors. It was Gerrald who had swooped in like a hero, defending me, making me feel safe. But now I knew the truth. The man I loved was nothing more than a cold-blooded executioner. And I was nothing more than a fool who had loved him blindly.
Chapter 2
He once told me that he would always be my shelter, my protector against the storms of life. That he would guard me for the rest of my days. I believed him. I gave him my body, my heart, my soul. When he asked for a hidden marriage, I agreed without hesitation. He feared that marrying a woman from a humble background would affect the stock price of the Raymond Group.
Every time I found out I was pregnant, Gerrald would light up like a child, shouting with excitement that he was going to be a father. He would hold me in his arms, his joy infectious. Afraid that I would suffer, he personally instructed his private doctor to use general anesthesia, ensuring I wouldn’t feel any pain. And every time, he stayed by my side, watching over me as if I were his most precious treasure.
I thought he cared about me. I thought he cared about our baby. But in reality, he was merely making it easier for himself to strangle our child with his own hands—to provide a specimen for his beloved. And I, foolishly, blamed myself. I thought my body was too weak, too incapable of carrying a child to term. I grieved over every stillborn, burdened with guilt, apologizing to him for my failures. Looking back now, I was nothing but a joke.
***
That night, after returning home, I waited for Gerrald to step into the shower. I booked an appointment to terminate my pregnancy. And I purchased a plane ticket. Three days from now, I would be gone. When he emerged from the bathroom, his hair still damp, he spoke casually, as if it were of little importance.
"Honey, I'm going on a business trip abroad in three days. I'll be busy for over a month."
A month—just enough time for his wedding. And his honeymoon. I looked up at him and asked softly, "Gerrald, I haven’t been feeling well lately. Can you stay? I’d like you to spend more time with me."
His brows furrowed instantly, his voice turning cold. "Honey, we’ve been together for years. You know how I am. I don’t like women interfering with my work. Be good and wait for me at home. I’ll bring you back a gift when I return."
My last shred of hope crumbled. I lowered my gaze, swallowing my disappointment. "You're right. I was being selfish. Go ahead."
Satisfied, Gerrald’s expression softened. He pushed me down onto the bed, his breath laced with the scent of alcohol as he murmured into my ear.
"Honey, the nutritionist says your body has recovered well. Why don’t we have a baby tonight? I really want to watch our child grow up with you."
A wave of bitter irony washed over me. I gently pushed him away. "Not tonight. You’ve been drinking. It could harm the baby’s health."
Knowing how much I cared about this, Gerrald didn't suspect a thing. He kissed my forehead before drifting off to sleep. As his breathing steadied, I quietly reached for his jacket. That was when I discovered it. A second phone. One I had never seen before.
My heart pounded as I pressed the power button. The lock screen wallpaper made my stomach churn. A picture of Gerrald and Lydia. Kissing. I tried a password. Lydia’s birthday. The screen unlocked. I tapped on their chat history. The first thing I saw sent my blood running cold. A photo of one of my stillborn children.
Gerrald’s message read:
[Lydia, I got the specimen for you. It’ll be shipped over by helicopter this afternoon. Fresh. It won’t affect your research data.]
Another message:
[You ran out of the last specimen? Don’t worry. Jenny is pregnant again. I’ll find a way to induce premature labor. You’ll have a new one soon. My girl is such a diligent and hardworking. She’s going to be a great doctor one day.]
And another:
[Lydia, when will you return to Brooklyn? I’ve been saving my wife’s place for you. Jenny is just a tool for me to relieve stress.]
My hands trembled as I touched my stomach, tears spilling down my cheeks. This child… should never have come into this world.
I continued scrolling.
Photo albums filled with pictures of them—together from childhood to adulthood. Tens of thousands of photos, each one captioned with a different love note. Seven years of my hidden marriage and he had spent most of it on ‘business trips’—all of them just excuses to be with her.
My breath hitched when I checked his saved messages. More than a hundred versions of wedding plans. Every detail, big and small, meticulously arranged. All personally planned by Gerrald. For her.
Chapter 3
Each version of the wedding plan was incomparably luxurious, allowing Lydia to choose her favorite.
For every holiday, big or small, Gerrald would prepare exquisite and expensive gifts for Lydia. No matter how busy he was, he would travel across the ocean just to personally deliver them to her.
And me? I only deserved the leftovers. I still remembered the day we registered our marriage. Gerrald didn’t even give me a single flower. That evening, as we walked past a florist, I gazed at the colorful bouquets, my heart filled with silent longing. Noticing my expectant eyes, he merely said in an indifferent tone, “Flowers are for little girls. You’re not that childish, are you, Honey?”
Yet, for Lydia, he bought an entire estate abroad and planted a vast garden filled with rare and exotic flowers, just because she loved them.
Looking at the photos of them kissing amidst that sea of blooms, I suddenly laughed—then burst into tears. Taking a deep breath, I snapped pictures of everything—the wedding plans, the gifts, the messages, the garden. And then, I found it. The fake marriage license. At the time, Gerrald had told me he didn’t want me to be troubled, so he arranged for the registration staff to come to our home for the formalities.
Turns out, they were just actors. I tore the certificate in half and tossed it into the trash. Returning to bed, I stared at Gerrald’s sleeping face—so calm, so handsome. Once, this sight had filled my heart with warmth. Now, it only made me sick. A night of silent sorrow left me sleepless.
***
The next morning, as usual, Gerrald had the nutritionist prepare an elaborate breakfast for me. In the past, I was always touched by his thoughtfulness, believing he truly cared for me. But after seeing those messages, I realized it was all just an act.
Every carefully planned, nutritious meal I ate—Lydia had already tasted first. The only difference? Hers were personally made by Gerrald himself. Thinking about it, a wave of nausea crashed over me. I barely made it to the sink before dry-heaving. Gerrald rushed to my side, his hands gently supporting me.
“Honey, what’s wrong?”
A glimmer of excitement flashed in his eyes.
“Are you… pregnant again?”
I caught the look on his face and inwardly sneered. Why are you so happy? Are you just waiting to use this child to please your sweetheart again?
I wiped my mouth, forcing a weak smile. “No. You know my body’s weak. After losing those babies, I can barely conceive anymore.”
Gerrald cupped my face, his voice laced with gentle reassurance. “Jenny, don’t blame yourself. It wasn’t your fault. I don’t hold it against you. Just focus on getting better and I promise—we’ll have a healthy child one day.”
He smoothed my hair, his tone turning lighter. “Don’t be sad, alright? Today is my mother’s 60th birthday. Many guests are coming to celebrate. We need to be there, my love.”
Then, his voice shifted slightly. “But… since our marriage is still a secret, even my mother doesn’t know. So if anyone asks about your identity…”
I already knew what he was about to say. I cut him off with a faint smile. “I understand. I’ll just say I’m your assistant.”
His face lit up with satisfaction. “I knew you’d understand, Honey.”
***
When we arrived at the hotel, the first thing I saw was Lydia clinging to my mother-in-law’s arm, acting like a spoiled child. She was dressed in a designer gown, pretending to take my mother-in-law’s pulse as she said playfully, “Auntie, you have the healthiest body! You could live to be two hundred years old.”
My mother-in-law beamed, delighted by her flattery. With a smile, she slipped off the jade bracelet on her wrist and placed it into Lydia’s hand.
“This belonged to the Raymond Family’s ancestors. It is passed down to the wives of the next generation.”
Lydia turned to me, her smile layered with hidden meaning. Yet, her words were sweetly innocent. “Auntie, this is too precious. I couldn’t possibly accept it.”
My mother-in-law laughed. “Oh, Gerrald brought his girlfriend today! That’s his future wife, isn’t it? Maybe she’ll give us five grandchildren one day. You should give it to her instead.”
Her eyes finally landed on me. She gave me a once-over, her gaze filled with open disdain as she took in my simple, understated dress.
“What girlfriend? That’s just Gerrald’s little assistant from work.”
Then, her expression darkened in disgust. “Running around, having illegitimate children without marriage and not just one—but five stillborns? Hah. Truly, God has eyes.”
Chapter 4
"Back in my day, a filthy woman like her would have been drowned in a pigsty," Gerrald’s mother spat, her eyes brimming with contempt. "She’s nothing compared to a clean and respectable girl like you, Lydia."
She took Lydia’s hands in hers, a sickeningly fond smile stretching across her face. "It’s decided then. Gerrald isn’t getting any younger and today, I will make the decision. He will marry you into the family."
This wasn’t the first time I had stood in the grand hall of the Raymond Family’s estate as nothing more than Gerrald’s ‘assistant.’
Back then, he had told me that he was afraid his mother would disapprove of my background and refuse to accept me. But he assured me that he had chosen me, that he would get the marriage license first and slowly work on winning his mother over. I had believed him. I had waited. Seven years had passed and I was still waiting.
Now, his mother, having somehow learned that I had given birth to five stillborn babies, regarded me with nothing but scorn. In her eyes, I was a shameless woman, a disgraceful stain on their family name.
"A shameless woman like her doesn’t deserve to stay another second in this house. Gerrald, get rid of her."
There was a time when Gerrald would have defended me, even if only half-heartedly. But now, with Lydia gleaming under the grand chandeliers, there was no space left for me in his gaze.
Feigning reluctance, he sighed, "Alright, since I’m leaving for a business trip abroad the day after tomorrow, I’ll take Lydia with me. We can hold the wedding there."
Not a moment’s hesitation.
Lydia feigned shyness. "But I haven’t even tried on my wedding dress or picked out my ring yet."
As if on cue, the doors opened and an array of twenty-three custom-made, haute couture wedding dresses was wheeled into the hall, each designed by world-renowned fashion masters, booked years in advance.
Each dress had a matching diamond ring, glistening like caged stars. One in particular—a pink diamond ring—I recognized from an international auction last month. It had sold for 200 million.
These weren’t last-minute arrangements. These had been prepared for a long time. Lydia gasped in delight, throwing her arms around Gerrald. "Oh my God, they’re all in my size! And twenty-three... the year we met! Gerrald, you were thinking of me even back then, weren’t you?"
She pouted playfully and he only smiled, eyes brimming with indulgence.
I looked down at my own plain silver ring—the one he had given me the day he proposed. It was too small, cutting into my skin every time I moved my finger. I had tried to take it off before, but I never could. And yet, those diamond rings—each an exact fit for Lydia—meant that he had never forgotten her size. It wasn’t carelessness. It wasn’t forgetfulness. He had never truly seen me at all.
Standing beside them, I felt like the punchline to a cruel joke. I turned on my heel and hurried to the restroom. Splashing ice-cold water onto my face, I tried to wash away the tears that wouldn’t stop falling. But no amount of water could cleanse the ache searing my chest.
As I stepped out of the restroom, I collided into a warm embrace. Gerrald.
He pressed a delicate bottle of perfume into my hands, his voice soft with feigned tenderness. "Are you jealous? Today is my mom’s birthday—I couldn’t refuse her. Agreeing to marry Lydia is just for show. Those dresses and rings? They’re just to please her."
His fingers brushed against my cheek. "Once I go abroad, I’ll explain everything to her. You and I... we’re the real couple. We have the marriage license."
His voice dipped lower, coaxing, cajoling. "Jenny, I promise you, after this month, I’ll tell my mother the truth. I’ll make our relationship public. I’ll give you the grand wedding you deserve."
He lifted the perfume bottle with a smirk. "I know how much you love perfumes. This one was difficult to get—it’s a brand-new creation by the top international perfumer. See how much I love you?"
I gripped the bottle, my fingers tightening around the glass. How laughable.
This perfume was one of the wedding favors prepared for his ceremony with Lydia. He had invited thousands of guests to celebrate their union, each receiving this very same bottle as a token of their love. And now, he had the audacity to hand it to me, spinning another lie, thinking I would believe it. My fingers curled around the cold glass, my knuckles white.
I smiled. "Thank you, Gerrald."
And in my heart, I vowed— This would be the last time he would ever deceive me.
Chapter 5
The one who's truly being deceived... is me. A notification popped up on my phone, reminding me of my surgery scheduled for the afternoon. Gerrald glanced at it, his brows knitting together in confusion.
"Honey, what surgery are you having?"
I quickly slipped my phone into my bag and smiled. "Nothing, just some spam. I understand everything you said—I understand you."
Satisfied, Gerrald kissed my forehead. "That's why you're my Honey. You always understand. I'll go entertain the guests first and then I'll come home to keep you company tonight."
Silently, I followed him, my heart weighed down with unease. But instead of heading back to the grand hall, he took a detour to the guest rooms upstairs.
Through the slightly open door, I saw her—Lydia—clad in nothing but a flimsy lace negligee. Her voice dripped with sweetness as she called out to him.
"Gerrald, why did you take so long? I've been waiting forever."
Gerrald hesitated, his expression flickering with uncertainty. "I think Jenny isn’t feeling well. Maybe we should skip tonight? There will be plenty of time after the wedding. I should go check on her first—"
Lydia hooked her arms around his neck, "Gerrald, are you really going to leave me all alone? It's been so long since we last did this... haven't you missed me?"
Her fingers trailed along his jaw as she whispered, "We're getting married soon. I want to give you a child. Tonight, you don’t have to hold back. As many times as you want... okay?"
A flicker of desire clouded Gerrald's eyes and in the next second, all hesitation vanished. He pushed her onto the bed, his restraint crumbling into nothingness.
The sounds that followed twisted like a knife into my heart. I couldn’t watch anymore. I turned and fled, stumbling blindly out of the hotel. The moment I hit the cold night air, nausea crashed over me in violent waves, forcing me to crouch down, heaving dry sobs into the pavement.
A sudden chill struck me. A bottle of ice-cold wine had been dumped over my head. Lydia stood above me, casually dropping the empty bottle, her lips curling in mockery.
"Jenny, are you some kind of breeding pig? Five stillborn children and you're still getting pregnant?" She crossed her arms, tilting her head. "Don't think I wouldn’t notice. That was pregnancy sickness just now. I study medicine—I know."
I stiffened.
She sneered, her eyes gleaming with cruel amusement. "You actually think being pregnant again will make Gerrald love you? Don’t be stupid. As long as I say the word, he’ll take your child from you just like the last five. After all, I’m the one he truly loves."
Lydia pulled out her phone and held it up in front of my face. My breath hitched. Images of my dead children filled the screen.
"Beautiful, aren’t they? And guess what? This one in your belly? It’ll end up just like the others."
My vision blurred with rage. Without thinking, I raised my hand to strike her—but she was faster. She grabbed a shard from the broken bottle and slashed her own palm.
Blood gushed from the wound as she let out a piercing scream. Before I could react, Gerrald came running toward us. The moment he saw Lydia's bleeding hand, his face darkened with fury. He shoved me aside and pulled her into his arms.
"Jenny, what the hell are you doing?!" he roared.
Lydia clung to him, sobbing pitifully. "Gerrald, I just wanted to be nice and invite her in for a drink. But she—she said I stole you from her. Then she attacked me! Maybe... maybe she’s not stable after losing so many children..."
Gerrald turned to me, his gaze burning with cold disgust.
"I was the one who chose to marry Lydia. If you have a problem with that, come at me. What right do you have to take it out on her?"
I opened my mouth, desperate to explain, but his next words froze me in place.
"Lydia is a doctor. Her hands are meant to save lives. And you dared to harm them? How vicious can you be, Jenny?"
His voice was sharp, filled with pure contempt.
"With a mother as cruel as you, it’s no wonder every child you gave birth to was stillborn. That’s just your karma."
Chapter 6
I looked at him in disbelief, as if seeing him for the first time. My voice cracked as I pointed at Lydia, my vision blurred with tears.
"My retribution? The ones who truly deserve retribution are you!"
I took a shaky breath, my entire body trembling with rage. "Gerrald, do you dare to tell me why my children—who were perfectly healthy inside me—were all born stillborn? And what did you do with their bodies?!"
Gerrald's brows furrowed, a flicker of impatience in his expression. "Your health was always weak, Jenny. The children suffered because of that. Their deaths were inevitable—you just didn't realize it when you were pregnant. I buried them properly. Why are you bringing up these meaningless things now? Apologize to Lydia."
I stared at him, my heart hollow, my hands numb at my sides.
I knew. Deep down, I knew this was the answer I would get. But why did it still hurt so much?
My fingers clenched into fists before loosening. Slowly, I bent down and picked up a shard of broken glass from the ground. Without hesitation, I brought it to my left hand and, in one swift motion, sliced off my pinky finger.
Blood spurted out instantly, splattering onto the cold marble floor.
"Jenny!" Gerrald's voice was sharp with alarm.
I lifted my gaze to meet his, my lips curling into a bitter smile.
"Gerrald, you’re right. Ms. Maron’s hands are meant to shine in the operating room. Since her palm is wounded, I’ll compensate her with a finger. Is that enough?"
The crimson pooled at my feet as I turned away, stepping over the blood like it meant nothing. Gerrald hesitated. For a moment, just a moment, I thought he might reach for me. But then Lydia whimpered and clung to him, her tear-filled voice breaking through the silence.
"Gerrald, my hand hurts..."
His hesitation vanished. He let me go.
***
As I sat in the hospital waiting room, my phone vibrated with an incoming call from Gerrald.
"Honey, how's your hand? Don’t worry, Lydia’s hand is fine. It's my fault today. I know you've always blamed yourself for the children's deaths and I shouldn’t have said those things."
I remained silent, my fingers tightening around my phone.
"But I promised my mother that I’d go through with the wedding. It's just for show, but if I delay the date, she’ll be upset. She’s getting old and her health isn’t the best. I’m worried..."
"I'm fine," I cut him off, my voice calm, detached. "Take good care of her. Don't let your mom worry."
Gerrald chuckled softly. "Silly Honey, what do you mean, 'your mom'? She's our mom. Don't worry, one day I'll make her recognize you."
There was a warmth in his voice, as if he truly believed his own words.
"The day after tomorrow, I'm leaving the country. Tomorrow, I'll come home and bring you something delicious. Be good, alright?"
I didn’t answer. Instead, my gaze drifted to the open ward door beside me, where a television was broadcasting the latest news.
[Breaking News: President of the Raymond Group pampers his wife to the extreme! Despite her minor hand injury, he called in top medical experts from across the country overnight. To cheer her up, he spent 300 million yuan at an auction on a jade beauty roller once used by a noble consort in the imperial court.]
The camera cut to Lydia, smiling coyly as reporters swarmed her. The headline flashed bold across the screen: The Most Adored Woman in the World.
I turned to the doctor standing beside me. "I'm ready." Even with the anesthesia, I felt the instruments scraping away at my insides, hollowing me out once more. I had lost another child. When I left the hospital, my arms wrapped around my empty stomach, tears slipped down my cheeks, silent and endless.
Baby, I'm sorry. In your next life, don’t choose me as your mother.
***
The next day, Gerrald didn’t come home. Instead, he called.
"Jenny, I’m sorry. I really wanted to be with you today, but my mom suddenly wasn’t feeling well. As her son, I have to be here for her."
I glanced down at my phone, my lips curling into a humorless smile. A minute earlier, Lydia had just posted an update on her social media.
In the photo, she sat on a plush hotel bed, draped in a silk bathrobe. Gerrald was kneeling at her feet, his hands gently massaging her ankles, his eyes filled with infinite tenderness.
I closed my phone and took a deep breath. Without hesitation, I gathered everything I owned and set it ablaze. The fire roared, devouring every trace of my existence in his life. The past seven years, the love I had given him, the pain I had endured—it all turned to ash before my eyes.
***
At dawn, I arrived at the airport. Just as I was about to board my flight, my phone buzzed with a new message from Gerrald.
"Jenny, are you up yet? Don't forget to eat breakfast. I really can't bear to be away from you—I miss you so much."
"Be good and wait for your husband at home. When I come back, I'll bring you a gift. I miss your lips. If only I could kiss them now."
I lifted my eyes and looked across the terminal. Not far from me, Gerrald was holding Lydia in his arms, kissing her deeply, even as his fingers moved effortlessly over his phone screen to send me that message.
How impressive. It must have been exhausting for him to keep up such an act. I didn't bother replying. Instead, I gathered the photos and chat records stored on my phone, compiled them into a single file and scheduled them to be sent to Gerrald’s work email. Then, without hesitation, I turned and walked towards the boarding gate—one that led to a different destination from his.
***
Meanwhile, Gerrald arrived at the lavish wedding banquet venue abroad. His mother and a hall full of esteemed guests were already gathered, eagerly awaiting the ceremony.
Frowning, he checked his phone again. Still no reply from me. A strange unease settled in his chest.
After a moment of thought, he called his assistant.
"Book a ticket for Madam to come here tomorrow. She must be feeling lonely at home without me."
It was a calculated move. By the time she arrived, the wedding would be over. Even if she wanted to cause a scene, it would be too late.
Holding Lydia’s hand, he stepped onto the stage just as his assistant came rushing forward, face pale, phone clutched tightly in his trembling hands.
"Mr. Raymond! There's a serious problem! Madam—she found out everything about the children!"
Gerrald’s breath caught. "What are you talking about?"
The assistant gulped before continuing, his voice shaking. "A few hours ago, she boarded a flight to another country. And just now, we received confirmation—the plane crashed."
